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Hi OMSers

I just recently turned 32 and feeling very anxious about still being childless.

I'm in a long distance relationship and it will be about a year a year before we are able to live together in the same country, which wastes even more time. It's a loving relationship but he feels that we have plenty of time. I don't want to wait, but I understand it takes two.

I told him today that I'd like the first by 33, otherwise none at all. Part of this is generally wanting to have some control in my life, which MS diagnosis last year made me feel very I had lost.

I realise I can meditate and focus on the present which would help eliminate my anxiety, but then I feel that if I stop thinking or talking about it, then I'm sending him the signal that I have stopped thinking or caring about the issue. I don't want to miss out on starting a family because I became too relaxed and my eggs ran out.

Any ideas on how to overcome this anxiety - which has potential to bring about a relapse? How to ignore the biological tick? How to accept that my partner (also 32) isn't ready?

And is this even a legitimate worry?
Transverse Myelitis 2008; MS diagnosis July 2014 (relapsing-remitting); OMS July 2014.
I'm having issues with the child thing too.
I'm 36, in a relationship which still needs work (he's Aspergers and a workaholic).
And time is certainly running out.
I'm also scared of something being wrong with the baby if I got pregnant as I'm older, and also the possible relaps 3 months after birth as some have experienced.
I still hav to fully wean off my antidepressant which I'm doing well with thanks to going on LDN,
( LDN has given me more endorphins than antidepressants ever did and is safe while pregnant)

You are not alone in your plight.

It's not in our best interests to get stressed about it, but get ourselves as well as possible so if the stars align we can get straight to it ( so to speak).

Worse case we don't get to have children, but there is the options of adoption or fostering.

Give yourself a break and focus on being well.
All the best.
X
I totally agree with blueberry, "give yourself a break and be well"
We put so much pressure on ourselves to be this way or that way and in the end it doesn't matter especially when conceiving or raising kids, they don't always fit in our time expectations.

Personally my partner and I were the first of our friends/families to want kids and we were only being told of our first child when we were in the initial process of consultations for IVF and when our friends that never wanted children were having their second.
Later we found out I had MS which would have explained a lot? But did not stop us for another child.

Be the best You and you will become the best Two and then be Three! (Or 4,5,6?)
1st sign no diagnosis Oct 1999, DX 2007, SPMS 2011.
Hi

I am 39 and 3/4. At the age of 32 I was still single. I fell pregnant with my first child when I was 37 and now have healthy and beautiful 17 months old.
I have not been trying. I was careless. I did not think too much about having children especially after being given diagnosis.
However I was never particularly careful either (or active!!) if you know what I mean!
I fell pregnant three months after starting OMS with all the flaxseed intake, gluten limiting, healthy lifestyle with exercise and meditation. Is that a coincidence? Maybe... but maybe not.

Not sure what else to say only - you are young. You are young and following the best lifestyle possible so please do not worry. Keep positive, take your mind of it. Go for holidays. Travel, enjoy life. It will come if it is meant to. x

Feel free to pm if you want.

M.
If you are going to do this together than perhaps you both need to be ready?
I can't help you on the relapse thing, I now know my first symptoms were 2 months after birth, but who knows if it was coming anyway?
Now I feel completely inept and out of line for the above comment about someone else's life when I actually only want to wish you well. I just want you to know that children add challenges to you and your relationships, ms or not, (for much longer than the pregnancy and first year ;-) )which we are quite capable of rising to but it is certainly not always easy nor does it always feel 'natural'. .... A good time to feel supported and having people to help is a bonus. Please don't put limits on yourself, ultimatums etc .
I wish you all the best for today and the future
I love your post 557, thank you.
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