I recently passed the three year anniversary of my MS diagnosis. Strangely enough, the day passed without me realizing it. My recent MRI brought up a whole mixed bag of emotions. MS can be tricky and sometimes silent which means how I feel day-to-day doesn’t mean that there isn’t progression happening inside my body.
Hopeful, anxious, confident, scared and happy were some of the things I felt leading up to my scan. Am I doing enough? What can I do different? If I have new lesions what did I do to cause them?
This is the reality of living with a sometimes silent passenger in my life. Most days I don’t even think of my MS, but then I will have a day that my body gives me strong reminders that absolutely things are different now. What I’ve come to be more OK with is that different doesn’t have to mean bad.
I appreciate that most of the time my body will let me know when I need to slow down and take better care of myself. It allows me time to reflect on what I have been doing, eating, stressing about or not addressing, and take some time to pause and give myself what I need.
There are even times when the wonderful supports in my life see these signs before I do and give me the nudge I need.
MS is something that I have, but it is certainly not who I am.